A few weeks ago, my friend Megan wrote a post about why she started a blog. This got me to thinking not so much about why I started but more so why I haven’t stopped. Now, when I’m struggling with perseverance, this seemed like the logical topic to expand upon.
Yesterday, I wouldn’t let myself open up my computer. I had things I needed to do for my blog, but I had reached the point where I was done. I didn’t want to write, I didn’t want to think, I didn’t want to engage.
This blog has been going strong for almost 2 and a half years, but some days I truly consider stopping it. It would be SO nice to not have to focus on the stupid numbers of how many views a post gets, or how many followers I have on a given platform, or how many conversions and clicks things have. It would be so nice to quit. To have my time back.
So why don’t I?
catalyst – (n.) – An event or person causing a change.
I am in no way claiming that my blog makes a huge difference. My reach is small, my audience is small.
But my blog has been a catalyst for me. It has caused change in my life. It has created doorways and avenues I never dreamed would be.
If I stop it, I am limiting that. I’m stopping something that has made me grow, and that I know can make me grow more. If I stop it, I’m limiting any reach that it does have.
In order to grow, you have to endure. And in order to hope that something is taken out of your feeble human hands and into hands so much greater, you have to trust.
This isn’t the first time that I’ve wanted to quit. I guarantee that it won’t be the last either. But the reason why I won’t let myself is just that – my Lord has proven so much to me through this. He’s used me, he’s enabled and equipped me. He’s strengthened me and challenged me. And to put it plainly, I really just want to see what else he can do.
Because if there’s anything I’ve learned since becoming a blogger, it’s that my God has plans so much greater than my own.