As you know, the past few weeks have been hard. We have spent more time in Greensboro than in Boone this April. I wouldn’t change any of it for the world; I got to spend such good quality time with my grandfather. I got to see him during his last really good time, listening to gospel music. I even got to play him the song from this post, and hear him say he loved it. It might’ve taken all the energy he had, but nothing can ever replace that time. It was priceless, or, as he put it, “a treasure.”
And while it was hard, it was something that leaves a gape in your heart, it was also some of the most encouraging, most Christ-centered times of my life. I felt God everywhere. And friends, that is such a beautiful thing.
You see, my grandparents love the Lord. They seek him and sing his praises with their every breath. My mother lives her life to glorify him. And I know that can sound insincere or like she would have a “holier-than-thou” persona but that isn’t it. It’s a humility that I don’t even know how to possess, a state of servanthood that becomes habit more so than decision, as natural as breathing.
So the past few weeks? They have shown me that I can search for God so much more than I do. He is more present in the world around me than I could ever guess, and I, living my self-absorbed and technology fueled life, fail way too often at noticing him.
Since my grandfather passed, we have been overwhelmed with signs of God’s love and assurances of his hand on the situation. Throughout the hardships my grandparents have faced this year (starting with this post) they have done nothing short of proclaim his name to everyone they see.
While their deep love is the biggest inspiration I could ask for, it also makes me ashamed at the ways in which I choose to share the love of my Lord. Why don’t I live like that? Why do I have reservations at sharing what the Lord has done to me? Why don’t I shout it from the rooftops, the way a love like that so greatly deserves?
I think it starts in failing to recognize it for what it truly is worth. Failing to recognize him. Failing to see him in my day-to-day occurrences, failing to appreciate blessings and baby-steps he grants me.
But friends, is he ever there. Gah, he is everywhere. Be it in the beauty he graces us with, in the conversations we get to have, in the emotions we feel or in the gestures we receive. They are indicators of his love. Of his power and the hand ever-present on us. I challenge you, and I challenge myself, open your eyes to them. See him. In the coincidences, in the small gifts of relief. In your friendships and circumstances, be them difficult or simple. See him everywhere. Because that’s exactly where he is.
Grandma, Mom, know that you inspire me daily. I may have a public platform for my faith, but your simple gestures and quiet reminders do more to proclaim his name than you will ever know. I cannot express in words how grateful I am.
This was one of the gospel songs my grandmother, mother and I listened to with my grandfather, and ohhhh does it capture how I feel. Skip ahead to 7:45 for the song itself:).
If you enjoy reading posts like this, please be sure to check out my year-long devotional, Heartbeat! You can find more information about it here.